Happy Valentine's Day!

On the subject of love you might wonder how to best show the people in your life how you appreciate them. And how you best respond to someone who appreciates you! The 5 Love Languages has been very helpful in my family in learning how to show you really love someone.

Take the quiz to find out your love language!

http://www.5lovelanguages.com

P.S. Don't forget our challenge from last year!

http://silkandpurple31.blogspot.com/2012/02/challenge-of-heart-2.html

Why Mothers Matter

If there's one thing about me worth knowing, it's that I love my mom. She's smart, funny, and one of the only people I know who could handle raising two teenage girls and two boys aged one and seven. I think of her as a friend to confide in and a godly example to live by. But unfortunately, a lot of young girls don't like or appreciate their mothers as much as they need to.

Now I know what you might be thinking. "This isn't Mother's Day. Why is she talking about moms?" Well, I know this sounds kind of weird, but I feel like this is a subject God's been calling me to write about. It saddens me to see girls arguing with their moms in public or to hear friends of mine complain about their moms when it's obvious that they don't realize their moms are trying to protect them. I'm not saying that I have a perfect relationship with my mother; nobody does. We have our share of disagreements just like any other mother and daughter, but she's always there for me.

She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many woman do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Proverbs 31:26-31

 The main point of this post is that mothers are some of the most noble, loving, and loyal people on earth. They never leave your side no matter what, because that's the way God made them. They provide not only their children, but everyone around them, with a sense of true and never-fleeting beauty unlike any other. But most of all, they teach us to be the godly women we were made to be. All that I am I owe to my mom and all the other women in my life. And if God blesses me with children when I am grown, I hope I can be half the mother to them that my mom has been to me.

 

So don't take your mom for granted, because you may not always have her. And don't forget to let all the other beautiful women in your life know how much you love them. Because whether or not you realize it, they care a lot about you. If you and your mom are arguing about something right now, just let her know you want to stop. Every minute you spend upset with each other is one less that you could have spent being happy and enjoying your special relationship. Enjoy your mom, and let her enjoy you. It's one of the best relationships you can have.

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By the way, love you, Mama! ;)

Pride and Prejudice (The Modern-Day Version)

     Let me start by saying that this is not a novel, my name’s not Jane Austen, and anyone who knows me can tell you that I’m nowhere even close to being British. The reason I chose Pride and Prejudice as the topic for this post is because while the great Elizabeth and Darcy are mere fictional characters, the essence of their story is constantly being portrayed in our society. We can’t see past each other’s shortcomings, and for this we often lose great opportunities.

A lot of our pride and prejudice comes from being stubborn. We are so set in our own ways that we refuse to see the big picture if it isn’t what we want it to be. Now don’t say you’re not a stubborn person, because this quality is in everyone to some extent. And if you’re still denying your stubbornness, then chances are you’re even worse off than we who admit it are. Being stubborn can be an obstacle when working with a group because those working with you may not agree with your ideas, which may or may not lead to the second thing that can be harbored within pride: having a bad temper. I know it can be hard to keep your cool when you have a lot to deal with -- school, housework, or whatever it is that builds stress can make you do and say things that you’ll eventually regret. One of the best ways to prevent this is to stop what you’re doing, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, “Is what I’m about to do honoring to God?” Just ask Him -- you’ll get an answer.

All I can say about prejudice is that it is what it is, and it doesn’t have to be something huge like racism or prejudice over religious beliefs. It can be as small and seemingly insignificant as, “Well, I don’t want to spend time with them because they’re not from the best neighborhood.” Now is that a national scandal? Not at all, but it can really hurt the feelings of whomever you’re talking about. Another example of an act of prejudice is being judgmental of people because of what clothes they wear. So what if someone you know doesn’t wear the latest trends, or if they don’t dress the way you typically dress? I mean, I myself enjoy thrift store hunting just as much as shopping at the mall. All that should be important to you is clothing yourself to glorify God and setting the right example for other girls around you.

I encourage you to not look at people as black or white, as Democrat or Republican, as rich or poor, or as any other label you can think of. Because God loves us all the same, and in the end His opinion is the only one that matters. So don’t succumb to the temptations of pride and prejudice. There are many arguments worth the choosing of one side, but strive not to become blinded by the things that don't matter! Elizabeth and Darcy were able to work out their silly arguments! You can have a happy ending, too! 

  For those of you out there who haven’t yet read Pride and Prejudice, be sure to check it out at your local library. It’s great!!!  

Drama in the Kingdom (Follow up)

Here is the follow-up post to our allegorical tale of Drama in the Kingdom.
Did you ponder over these questions? What were your conclusions? Here are mine:

Who do the characters in this story represent?

The characters all represent members of the body of Christ. All are people in the kingdom of God, but some represent people who have grown deeper in their walk with Christ, like Meek.

Our relationships within the body of Christ are very important. They can strengthen us and encourage us to grow in Christ. Unfortunately, when we treat relationships with a self-centered attitude of what we can gain from the relationship rather than what we can give, we can find ourselves in broken friendships.

On what does Vanity and Prance base their relationship?

From the evidence of their activities and conversations, their relationship is based upon a fellow and how they can attract the eyes and attention of the fellow and make everyone jealous. 

Do they strive to grow a deeper relationship with each other?

Because Prance and Vanity base their relationship on shallow things, their relationship is shallow. It's based on variables -- fellows, fashion, and fame are always changing. Basing relationships on things that change will only make a friendship unsteady. If Prance and Vanity had developed a friendship with Christ as their foundation, their conversations and priorities would be different and their relationship a much deeper one. 

What is the difference between Meek vs. Prance and Vanity?

Meek shows us what a person who cares about others looks like. No, she may not have the latest and greatest fads, but her concern is not on fads and what the popular culture decides. She would rather honor her grandmother.

What does each character value in this story?

Vanity and Prance value clothing, popularity, attention, and scoring a dance with the prince.

Meek values people, is wise about how she spends money, and takes time to talk with others -- even those who might not "like her."

Does this story reflect real life issues?

Unfortunately, yes. You may be going through a tough time in a friendship right now. Take a step back and evaluate what you have based the friendship on. Ask yourself how you could have been a better friend and if you've sinned against her. If necessary, go to her and ask for forgiveness.

Is the argument over the shoes the real issue in this tale?

No, the real issue is all we have talked about above. The shoes are only a small scenario of how Vanity and Prance really value each other.

Who has more fault? Vanity or Prance?
They are both at fault and both could work to restore the relationship. They are both competitive about who will be deemed the fairest in the land. The ending of this store doesn't have to be tragic. Each could work to deepen the relationship with each other, but before they do this, they need to grow in Christ! Growing closer to Him will help them in all the relationships they have, and it will do the same for us!

Drama in the Kingdom

Princess Vanity and Princess Prance are going to a ball! The biggest one in the kingdom -- everyone will be there!!! Even Prince Charmsalot is going to be there and every princess is going to want to dance with him!

Vanity and Prance have to look perfect for the ball! They've looked in magazines and watched style reports for weeks. All they've talked about is fashion and Prince Charmsalot! One day on an outing to try on dresses, they ran into Princess Meek. Vanity said to her with a snicker, "Meek, what are you wearing to the ball?" Meek replied, "I think I'm wearing my blue dress -- the one my grandmother gave me to wear for my birthday party." Prance rolled her eyes. How could anyone wear a dress that was five years dated, and that blue dress was not the prettiest dress in the first place. Vanity and Prance really didn't like Meek. She was too "holy" for them, so they went on their way.

As they were shopping, Vanity found the perfect pair of shoes -- sparkly platformed pumps with red soles, but Prance loved them, too! Prance said the shoes looked better on her. Vanity said that they were the only shoes that would go with her dress. They came to the agreement that if one couldn't have them nobody should, so they put the shoes down and continued shopping. 

The next day Prance went back to the shoe store in the morning and bought the shoes anyway. Vanity did the same that afternoon. The evening of the ball arrived and when Vanity saw Prance and when Prance saw Vanity, they became VERY mad at each other, and they both decided they didn't want to be friends anymore.

I wish I could tell you that they made up in the end, but this is not the case. They remained angry at each other and they never really talked again.

So what is the moral of this story? Is it you should never fight with your friends? Well maybe, but let's look at Vanity's and Prance's character and how they built their relationship. Let's break it down in a series of questions. In a couple of days, I'll post the answers.

Who do the characters in this story represent?

On what does Vanity and Prance base their relationship?

Do they strive to grow a deeper relationship with each other?

What is the difference between Meek vs. Prance and Vanity?

What does each character value in this story?

Does this story reflect real life issues?

Is the argument over the shoes the real issue in this tale?

Who has more fault? Vanity or Prance?

Middle School Madness

   

  There comes a time in everyone’s life (usually between the ages of 10 and 14) that one experiences something known as "the awkward phase." For most, it can be pretty brutal -- a time when relationships are tested and hormones wreak havoc until it's hard to recognize oneself. A lot of people spend this time trying to rediscover themselves, even though who they are is normally a lot better than what they're trying to be. They try new hairstyles, wear lots of different kinds of clothes, and basically try as hard as they can to ignore the fact that they aren't nearly as old or wise as they wish to be. Thankfully, I'm nearly done with this phase, but if you're just starting it, or you're somewhere right in the middle, don't worry. Take it from me; there's a light at the end of this seemingly endless tunnel.

  

One thing that a lot of us middle schoolers (especially those of us who are girls) worry way too much about is our appearances. We fuss over ourselves from head to toe as if those around us expect us to look like Barbie dolls from the moment we wake up until we go to bed. Even the thought of looking in a mirror is enough to make us feel queasy, and don't even get me started about getting ready to go places. I can't count the number of times I've rummaged through my closet, only to find that all my clothes either don't fit or make me feel as if I look like a two-year-old. I'll get suggestions from my mom or sister, and as much as I trust their fashion expertise, more times than not I'll find myself thinking, "Are you serious? I'm actually about to go out in public and you want me to wear that?" I don’t know if you have something better, but my favorite cure for this problem is to look out a window at all the beautiful trees surrounding my house. It reminds me that the same God who created me created those trees, as well as all the wonderful things in the world. He wouldn’t make anything ugly, and since he made me, I’m obviously not half as bad off as I feel sometimes.

  

  Another thing that really bugs me is the fact that I don't know everything. Have you ever said or done something only to be corrected by someone older than you because you made a mistake? Well, I don’t know about you, but it drives me crazy. I can be a bit stubborn sometimes, so being reminded that I have more shortcomings than I’d like to have can really get on my nerves. I’m not perfect, and I know there’s nothing I can do about that, but can’t I let my friends think I am? Not when I make an obvious mistake and have someone point it out to me. “If only I could go back and change what happened in that situation,” I’ve told myself countless times. But unless one of those many people that are a lot smarter than I’ll ever be invents a time machine, I can pretty much rule that out as impossible. One thing I can do, though, is pray for strength and patience as I deal with the inevitable: that there will always be someone out there who is more knowledgeable than I am, whether it be about writing, music, electronics; there will be a lot of people that know more about this. Unfortunately, I’m one of the most technologically illiterate people I know. There is one good thing about this, though. I’ll always have someone to help me if I get stuck on something difficult, as long as I have a willing spirit to learn.

  One last thing I think a lot of middle school girls have a lot of trouble with is the confusion of dating. A good number of us either have a “boyfriend” or wish we did. I personally want to wait until I’m older before I start looking for the person I’m going to marry someday. It’s a lot harder to save yourself for the man God made for you if you go through a bunch of unnecessary "lovey-dovey" relationships that will most likely lead to heartbreak. I also don’t think that people my age are mature enough to make decisions about things such as this. A relationship between a man and a woman is the most important earthly relationship there is, and I don’t want to make any decisions I’ll regret. One thing my mom told me to do when I have any doubts about this is to pray for my future spouse and ask God to help him make wise decisions in his life. This helps me to remember that God has a plan for me if I will choose to follow it.

  Whether you’re at an awkward time in your life or not, remember to always make God the center of your life. Even though with everyday distractions we may sometimes lose our focus, we must always strive to get back on track. When you’re in middle school, life can be rough, but with God on your side you can beat out the madness.